While using a restroom in a local pub, I came across Dentyne’s new advertising campaign.  Apparently, the old “brush your breath with Dentyne” slogan needed to be tailored to the drunk and ready to score demographic.  These pamphlets first caught my eye because the red book below was being distributed in the men’s room.  Likewise, as I stood over the urinal reading the pamphlet title I constructed it in my mind as “Dentyne’s Quickie Guide to Hunting for Men.”  Needless to say, I found its placement in a men’s room to be an interesting marketing choice. In flipping through the book, I put together that, indeed, the book was meant to be read as “Dentyne’s Quickie Guide to Hunting. For Men.”  Incidently, Dentyne’s marketing team must have received this feedback already, because the campaign on the website reads “Dentyne’s Hunting Tools for Men.” 

Having the mystery of the title solved, I flipped through the book to see what tips Dentyne had to offer.  That’s when the advertising campaign took a turn for the worse.  The guide outlined the types of women I’d find in the female ’species’ (see top banner for images).  Likewise, Wendy confirmed that there was a pamphlet for women in the ladies room that followed the same format (see bottom banner).  Apparently, the species we are hunting in the dating scene are predominantly white (possibly entirely white - there might be an asian, and possibly a hispanic person if you are being generous in your interpretation of the artistry).  One thing is certain, there are no black members of Dentyne’s eligable dating scene. 

At the end of the day though, it is packed with useful tips.  For example, ladies should “always bring a less attractive friend… so you won’t be upstaged.”  Men, “if you get shot down, move on to one of her friends” (be warned, if following the guide, she will likely be less attractive).  Likewise, the website supplements the guides nicely with information such as: how to speak like a guy (PDFs about sports, action movies, finance and do it yourself projects), fake business cards, fake back stories of your life, photos to put in your wallet that the opposite sex will think cool (women: motorcycles, dogs and cars / men: puppies, poor african tribes, old people), and much, much more!

To be fair to Dentyne, I am not in their target demographic.  Being happily married, I am fortunate to be out of the dating scene and not in need of a handy guide such as this.  However, there was a time when Dentyne’s primary purpose was to “brush your breath,” now they just make you feel like washing your hands.

Categories: Miscellaneous